The older I get, the more I am stumped by juxtaposed realities. Maybe it is all that snobby education I received, but the more I learn, the stupider I get. Does that make sense? A man I once knew, no less than an academic and musical genius, overheard me say that the more education I earned the more I realized how little I know. His response was, “I have five degrees. Just think how stupid I feel.” Hmmmm. So is it simply that all those years of classes, study and research make a person realize how infinite the pool of knowledge out there really is? It would be impossible to conquer it all, so I will just have to accept the fact that my teeny mind and I really are less than a spec in the big picture. These days, I am just happy and damn proud! if I can figure out how to operate my phone. It is frustrating to sit in a meeting full of young bucks that communicate effortlessly in a world of invisible waves and wireless whatever, while I struggle with my one gadget like a pig staring at a wristwatch. True. My fingers feel too big and clumsy for the screen. I cannot do anything at all with my phone unless my mouth is open and my tongue is sticking out. Even then, the stress level is unrivaled. Alone in my own house, I am embarrassed at my own incompetence. At one recent board meeting I attended, I suggested that in the future, because I live so far outside of the city, I join the group via Skype. I was so proud of myself and just knew that they were all equally impressed. And for the record, yes, I do Skype with friends and family all the time. Jeez. It wasn’t easy to master, but now, well now…..The response I got was first silence, then the gorgeous thirtysomething President of the Board initially confirmed my brilliance by saying, “Sure. Why not? (Pause) Or better yet we can Facetime. You have Facetime, right? Don’t you have an iphone? Do you have the app? That works right?” Uh…. rrrriiiggghhht. Great.
What I want to know is why we ever stopped using smoke signals in the first place. Or, for that matter, cups and strings. Worked fine if you ask me. Wow. So, of all the knowledge and skills I have gleaned in my life, apparently the only two that a absolutes I have garnered are these.
Good enough for me. Today anyway. Tomorrow, I will play with my new Facetime app.