Ready, set, go! The presidential campaign is officially off the ground and dominating the airwaves. Yes, the two candidates are showing up more and more and saying less and less than ever before, but now they bring along orchestras, special effects and stage sets. I for one am as bored stiff with this game as I am with the other reality shows on television. True, I harbor no passion for politics as it exists today and never have. However, even if I did, the bloom would have faded by now. The entire campaign process has become less about the issues than ever before. It is a rarity today that any political candidate actually point blank answers a question. They sound more like bratty first graders who prefer to keep the focus on the other children so that they do not have to fess up to a decision or position. Sadly, candidates are coached to ride on charm , looks, theatrics and sound bites . Artful dodgers they are. Six year olds are masters of the artful dodge as well. For example………
Teacher: Billy, tell me what kind of animal this is in the picture I am holding.
Billy: Pointing at Bobby. He doesn’t know what it is! He acts like he knows all about animals, but he doesn’t know what it is! He never even had a pet! Waaaaaaaaa!
Bobby: Uh uh! I know what animals are! Billy doesn’t even like animals! He had a cat once and he sprayed it with the hose! Waaaaa!
Teacher: Billy, we aren’t talking about Bobby. I am asking you what kind of animal this is in the picture. Bobby sticks his tongue out at Billy.
Billy: Bobby just stuck his tongue out at me!
Bobby: Did not did not did not!
Billy: Did too did too did too!
Teacher: Ok boys. Let’s try something else. Bobby, what do you plan to bring for show and tell tomorrow?
Bobby: Last week, Billy brought a stupid old flag that wasn’t even American!
Billy: Bobby said that the flag was stupid and it wasn’t. It belonged to a queen one time! Waaaaaa!
Bobby: Billy said queer! Billy said queer! Billy said a bad word!
Billy: Did not did not did not! I said Queen! QUEEN!
Bobby: Did too did too did too! Waaaaaaaaa!
Teacher: Boys stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
And honestly, don’t you wish that they would? I know I do.